Americans Committed to Tradition of Cultural Ignorance This Cinco De Mayo

‘MERICA __ Tex-Mex restaurants  across the country are banding together this week to ensure the flawed traditions of margaritas, sombreros, maracas, bastardized Mexican food and overall cultural cluelessness are again propagated upon masses of uninformed Americans this Cinco De Mayo. Friday’s Cinco De Mayo promises to be another idiot-dance of obliviousness celebrated by legions of white…

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Mirrey of the Week: April 24

Luis Alejandro Mayer Sanchez III is the first-ever Mirrey Of The Week featured in El Pejibaye, which is expanding its coverage breadth to highlight this fine specimen of overprivileged, underworked jovenes found celebrating themselves in the Mexico City metropolis. Mayer, known by friends as El Káiser, is a recent ITAM graduate employed by his father’s commercial real…

Mexico to Build Cancun Wall to Keep Out Spring Breakers

CANCUN — Mexico’s senate approved a bill yesterday to build a wall around the tourist mecca of Cancun to discourage the flood of vacuous drunken Junior College troglodytes that descend upon the city’s pristine beaches every spring break. “When America sends its people, they’re not sending their best…Stop me if you’ve heard this before,” Senator…

Mae of the Week: March 10

This issue’s mae is Chunche. Chunche is an O.G. from Higuerones, Alajuela, but is living it up now in the Heredian Hills. You can usually find him running with his crew, sniffing butts and murking squirrels, but Chunche says his favorite activity is trolling for perras. When asked if he’d ever go back to the street life Chunche said “Nah, hell no!…