BREAKING: Johnny Araya Sleeps In On Election Day After All-Night Rager

Hires stand-ins to make public appearances while candidate curbs hangover SAN JOSE — According to various reports, PLN candidate and presidential favorite Johnny Araya missed all scheduled morning appearances after an “epic noche” bar hopping across chepe. Various sources have told El Pejibaye that Araya was seen last night chugging Olaffos at Caccios, shooting spitballs from…

Mae of the Week: January 30

This week’s M.O.T.W. is a familiar face: Costa Rica President Laura Chinchilla. Chinchilla is 54 and lives in Rohrmoser with Óscar Arias’s parents. After four exhausting years of covering shit up, she is looking forward to watching someone else “give it a go.” In her spare time she enjoys borrowing money and unquestionably accepting invitations to…

Mae of the Week: January 16

This week’s M.O.T.W. is Costa Rican presidential candidate Luis Guillermo Solis. Solis is from Montes de Oca and is getting absolutely demolished in the Presidential polls despite being by far the most educated. Solis was a Fulbright Scholar at the University of Michigan while leading candidate Johnny Araya can neither spell Fulbright nor Michigan, which…