President Says Burger King Did Not Act Alone in Murder Plot
SAN JOSE — Costa Rican President Laura Chinchilla published a tweet yesterday commemorating the anniversary of the assassination of President BLT and urged further investigation into the alleged conspiracy between Burger King and the ham sandwich.
Chinchilla’s tweet, which was thought by many to be an erred reference to the 50th anniversary of U.S. President JFK’s death, was in honor of “one of history’s finest sandwiches and most unjust falls from grace,” she said at a press conference Thursday. Costa Rican flags flew at half-mast on Thursday in remembrance of Nov. 21, 2008, the day Burger King removed the BLT from its primary menu to offer it as a wrap, considered by most to have led to a cataclysmic drop in popularity and the end of its reign as the world’s favorite sandwich.
“If you don’t think the ham sandwich had anything to do with BLT’s downfall, you need to do some additional research,” Chinchilla said. “For years the ham sandwich waited for its opportunity to topple the BLT. Burger King did not act alone that fateful day.”
Chinchilla’s tweet appeared on her account the same day she mistakenly tweeted that Venezuelan President Nicolas Maduro was instrumental in an 1856 Costa Rican independence battle. When asked if she meant to refer to President John F. Kennedy, or JFK, instead of a Bacon, Lettuce and Tomato sandwich, or BLT, Chinchilla was resolute in her backing of what she called “the world’s yummiest three-ingredient snack”.
“What has had more direct impact on our lives?” She asked. “A President that died half a century ago, or a sandwich that continues to be oppressed at drive-thrus across the world?”
While Chinchilla admitted to the flubbed Maduro tweet, she said that with continued efforts to unearth the truth of the Burger King-ham sandwich conspiracy, the BLT could again return to prominence.
“I leave you with this thought,” Chinchilla said. “Ask not what the BLT can do for you, but what you can do for the BLT.”